winds sift memories,
tides turn...the moment's gone. k.g. beatty, 1998
The above excerpt was taken from a literary project I was working on several years ago. I was trying to illustrate how quickly time passes - whether we wish it or not. And once the moment has passed there is no reclaiming it.
The scary thing is, time seems to march by even faster for me with each passing year! As I look around me, I can't believe I'm now officially middle aged, have been married for 20+ years, and am preparing for my second child's high school graduation. How did this happen so quickly?
Years ago when I was a mother of two very young children, I struggled to manage the demands of my little ones. I remember complaining to my mother one day, expecting her to commiserate with my situation as she had raised eight kids herself. I was quite surprised by her reply.
"Just enjoy your children," she advised, "Before you know it, they'll be gone. I really miss those days." At the time, having grown children seemed like a lifetime away. Now - in the proverbial blink of an eye later - it's arrived:
In looking back across the years, I realize how often I naively assumed things were going to stay pretty much the same for a long time. I know there were moments I let slip away, figuring there would always be time to make use of them later. Unfortunately, "later" came much sooner than I expected. The time for making memories with my oldest kids has passed - all I can do now is hope they are good ones.
However, I still have two kids at home - one of them, a four-year-old. This little guy was a bit of a surprise, but a very welcome one. I can see how my parenting style has changed as I interact with him; I often find myself setting aside some of my daily duties to play with him, as I realize now that if I put it off until "later", it may never happen. Maybe this is why many siblings think the youngest child of the family is spoiled; I personally feel that by then the parents have finally figured things out a bit :)
I think back to playing childhood games and asking for a "do-over" if I made a mistake or didn't get the result I wanted. Unfortunately, this strategy doesn't work in real life! Once a second, or an hour, or a day has passed, it's gone for good. Sunsets fade, rain showers pass, and the chance to act is gone. As much as we wish it, there is no going back.
That's why it's important to take advantage of what EACH moment has to offer, especially in context to relationships with people who are important to you.
I love these words in the song Unwritten by Natalie Bedingfield:
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
The last line holds the key; you are the only one with the power to make the most of your moments. To take advantage of each moment. To live life the way you want to live it. To have no regrets. To seize the day.
The time is now, before your moment is...gone.
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